i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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