I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
