I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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