So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
