i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
