i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
