Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
