Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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