What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
