She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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