I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
