You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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