It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize