my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize