lets start a swedish sibling band together
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
