No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
