You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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