I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
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