just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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