The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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