he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I touched a dick in church today
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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