actually, I'm a sock model
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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