Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
