Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
