Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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