I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
