so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
