Just cropdusted the office
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
