Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
