But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Randomize
