she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
