Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize