At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
i think i just lost a toe
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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