You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
