"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Randomize
