I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize