i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
