Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Operation Purity has been aborted
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
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