I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
