I'm really into asian looking animals
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
