Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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