hell yes lets make some ravioli
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
