just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
