Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Randomize
