i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
