Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I think people are normalizing furries
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
