i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
