Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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