Sponge bath it is.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize