I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
